And All the Little Come-ons...

They were all just run-ons
And when I think of your arms
I forget what street to turn on - I'm Afraid of Everything  by Braid

I spend a lot of time doing dishes out here in CA.  Mostly washing the French press.  Mostly because it is cold and overcast a lot.  Mostly because everyone here has to be cool and not use something easy like a Mr. Coffee.   You know, because French presses make SUCH a good cup of coffee.  Because it's made with the world's worst tasting water. Anyway, the windows are always open, and it just kind of makes me feel like singing all the time.  Which is unfortunate because I have an awful voice.  And I live on a street with lots of foot traffic.  So I'm scrubbing the godforsaken French press (which I swear makes weak coffee), and singing my favorite Braid song.  And then I'm thinking that a super hot guy should walk by and be like "Hey, I love that song!  And I'm creative and funny and passionate and neither bi-polar nor an addict and I have tons of indie cred and I can fix your truck and/or computer and cook and surf and fingerbang well.  Let's makeout and fall madly in love just like a Braid song but with less angst."

Except no one good walked by, and if they did, they would tell me that I'm not 20 years old and to grow the eff up and stop trying to star in a bad Gen X film.  But then I got a text saying that Bob Nanna from Braid was doing an in-store San Diego's coolest place to see and be scene M-Theory Music, (say hi to Rick when you're there - he's adorable, and much to my chagrin, strives to be the exact opposite of Jack Black's character in High Fidelity).  I decided to go, since I have yet to learn that the bands of my youth can never live up to my post-post punk/hardcore expectations (this means you, Dinosaur Jr.! I gave you two chances!!).  But not to worry, he put on a good show.  I just felt a little out of place because I don't have an iPhone and/or a fixie.  And there were a couple creepy guys who kept addressing Bob as BOB, but it was just awkward because you could tell they were trying in vain to force a rapport that would never happen, due to their obvious hero worship and the fact that they were saying his name way louder than necessary. 

BOB was gracious and took lots of requests, even though these weirdos kept asking for songs that he obviously didn't want to play.  And then it was silent and a meek girl in pigtails yelled out that she wanted to hear "I'm Afraid of Everything," which was quite a relief, because that's what I wanted to hear, but I'm not really the type to yell at requests in a room full of emo-back-when-emo-meant-something-but-I-still-hate-the-term emos.  BOB agreed to play it.  And then the fanboys continued calling out for the same songs that he already said he didn't want to play, so he played something else to appease them.  And then he played something else.  And then he mentioned that he'd play her request.  And then he played something else.  And then then he played something else.  And then it was over.  But that's okay, because he played a lot of old stuff that I liked, and had he played the song, it probably wouldn't have lived up to my expectations.  Here's an old performance of the song if you're curious.  He's a good songwriter, and I think the drummer kicks ass. 



And then when I was leaving, I scraped the wall with my car!  I have never hit anything parking.  Ever!  I feel like such a loser/bad driver.  Also, Rick introduced me to BOB and I couldn't help but try for some witty banter.  BOB obliged, but I'm thinking it was a bit much.  I'm thinking the whole witty banter thing might be a bit much.  A guy friend advised that in light of the Grannypantygate, I should tone it down a bit, and just be cute until the unsuspecting fellow has already fallen madly in love, and then I can start to be myself.  But that's kinda unethical I think.  False advertising, if you will.  Personally, I love shittalkers, as long as they are funny and not mean.  Witty banter is a huge turn-on, and I don't think I should tone it down.  But I'm hanging out at record stores by myself in my 30s, so what the hell do I know?  I'm open to suggestions!

Here's a funny scene from High Fidelity.  And for those of you who don't know, Barry asks if the guy's daughter is in a coma b/c during the 80s, that song brought someone out of one.