My Super Power Sucks

On my flight home from Atlanta (no, I didn't run into NeNe), I got to watch some of "Ironman" while peering through the seats to the guy infront of me's laptop. (Hello, awkward sentence.) I guess the movie was okay, even though I'm not much for special effects. It was probably my hangover, but I started to think about how my super power is that I run into people in really random locations all over the western hemisphere.

And it's not even that I travel that much. Or have millions of friends, either. But I did run into Lisa, one of my BFFs, on the beach in Jamaica. And then one time I was walking down the street in New York, having a conversation about a dreamboat, which my New York friend had just framed his modeling ad and put on her mantle, and ran right into said model. Then, while attending New York friend's Austin wedding, I ran into an ex from college at the Austin airport who was also in town for a wedding, but not the same one.

Of course, as I'm unfolding myself out of my middle aisle seat (thankfully not seated next to a straight-from-the-gym bodybuilder like on my previous flight), I hear someone call my name from the row behind me. It was an ex that I hadn't spoken to since he told me he decided to get back together with his high school sweetheart five years ago. Great! What's even more odd is that I really don't even have that many exes to be running into like this.

For some reason, he thought that I would want to catch up with him, and I was stuck conversing with him all the way to the baggage claim. Now this guy, we'll just call him Sam (stands for short angry man), was soooo, soooo, soooo boring. But I remember being proud of myself for dating him because he was neither an artist nor an unemployed mooch. He had a job and a house and was even a Republican.

We went out to dinner one night and he made a comment about how we need Mexicans around because "someone needs to mop the floors at night." After that I decided to get under his skin a little bit. I started asking him some questions about why his values and definition of success were the right ones. He got all fired up, but couldn't really tell me why achieving made him happy. Then we both went back to Ohio for Christmas, where I avoided him. The next time I saw him, he took me out for an awkward dinner and then told me that his new girlfriend was flying in the next day. (Yeah, I don't know why I went out with him again. Probably thought it was the mature thing to do.)

So anydickhead, I was a bit surprised when he wanted to catch up. I asked him if he was still a Republican and he asked if I was voting for McCain. Strained laughter on my part. He follows by asking me for my number?? I really didn't feel like hashing things out infront of all of the tourists, so I gave him the digits, wishing I had splurged for a seat upgrade. Wishing for Ironman boosters on my shoes. Wishing for invisible powers instead.