Dramazon Takes on Online Retail Giant / "Intellectual" Property Laws

Not really.  But if there is one thing you must know about me, it is that I am one vindictive bitch.  When I first decided to make a blog, I just wanted to have a regular .com website, but amazon.com said I wasn't allowed to use any form of their name.  You know, because the word "amazon" means online marketplace, and I figured that my tall tale target audience would be a bunch of geeks looking to give their cutting-edge take on the latest Dan Brown novel.  Of course my blog's name is a thinly veiled attempt to trick people into reading my crap by piggybacking on amazon.com's customers - it has nothing to do with my wordplay proclivities.

And now I'm trying to be more responsible in my blogging.  Meaning that since I obsessively research things, and think it's ridiculous to pay full price for anything, I'd like to start sharing direct links to stuff that the three of you would really like.  Blogger had something on my dashboard (yeah I don't know what that means, either) the other week about amazon.com coming up with a program that makes it easy for bloggers to add links to products.  I thought it sounded like a good idea, plus I could probably make an extra $1.35 in 2010 from my kickbacks.  I signed up.  And then I got this email:

"Hello,
When you filled out our online application form, you listed the URL for your web site as:

 http://dramazon.blogspot.com/

We do not allow anyone with a URL that includes "amazon," "endless," or any other trademark of Amazon.com, Inc. or its affiliates. This also includes variations or misspellings of any of them. Please review our Operating Agreement for further details:

https://affiliate-program.amazon.com/gp/associates/agreement

Additionally, we do not accept URLs which contain our competitors' names or any misspellings of our competitors' names as a gesture of goodwill to the Internet industry.

I hope this helps. We look forward to seeing you again.
Best regards,
 Bert G.
Amazon.com
We're Building Earth's Most Customer-Centric Company"


Well, I immediately replied to Bert G., telling him that my blog's name had nothing to do with his lame, soul-sucking monopolistic employer, promising, "I will be sure to let my readers know about your 'customer-centric' company's draconian co-opting of the English language. And then I will be steering them to other online retailers." 

Apparently, customer service doesn't accept responses to your customer service issues, and my eloquent email was returned unread.  So now I am making good on my promise.  While I didn't really care that much about letting you know where to shop online, it has now become a mission to tell you where to buy stuff that I like.  In the meantime, I will be boycotting amazon.com until they stop discriminating against tall women with blogs.  (Until I get bored and need to buy some books.)

(This isn't actually Bret G.  I think.  From ssqq.com)